The Night the NRL was sunk

Police are searching for answers from the NRL after concerned citizens reported numerous incidents at a club on Saturday night.

3 Rabbitohs were seen drinking light beers slowly over a 4 hour period.

4 Bulldogs players were seen dancing respectfully with women only to back off when they heard ‘we’re just here for a girls night thank you’.

3 unnamed players were seen arguing with the bouncer about ‘the pro’s and con’s of taking it one game at a time’.

Jonathan Thurston was overheard at the bar to threatening to punch ‘whoever let the irreplaceable Kerry O’Brien leave 7:30 Report’.

A former player never turned up, admitted to being arrested by a moving Iranian entry in the Sydney Film Festival.

Todd Carney was seen driving away from the club at 55km/hr in a 70km/hr zone. Police suspect he must have switched the street signs.

Other players not seen at the club seemed unbelievable well rested the following day. One claimed he’d ‘gone to bed around 9:30pm after turning off Wild Things. There was just too much unnecessary female nudity’.

Police are treating all incidents as highly suspicious.

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